Dimmy was running late for work, well he wasn’t really running he was skating on his tiny yellow roller skates by the way. Dimmy works at the hospital, when he got to work Dimmy saw a sign on the door. The sign said, out of order so he went through the roof door and then jumped in and he went straight to his desk. As the elevator doors opened, lots of water came out and Dimmy didn’t want to be to late, so he swam down the stairs and got to his desk and saw a sign that said closed for cleaning. This made him mad.
DIMMY THE DOCTOR
on
Hey ed : D
I liked your story and it had lots of character to it! But it’s a little confusing because everything just kind of happens rather than flow. But other than that, I liked it!
~Addison
Hi Ed, I enjoyed reading your piece. One thing I loved about the story was how the events happened. It helped me visualize the scene. One thing I would improve on is punctuation. But overall, this was a good story. -Jack from IL.